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Are you uncomfortable―even afraid―about the prospect of speaking before a group of people? Do you have trouble getting your message across? When you speak, do others listen, or can you feel their attention wandering?
Effective communication is essential in business and in everyday life. The most powerful communicators reach not just our minds but our hearts: They win our trust. You can learn to impress and persuade other people by following Bert Decker's program in You've Got to Be Believed to Be Heard.
In this revised and updated edition of his bestselling book, he distills his expertise into a fresh new approach to speaking, with examples and how-to exercises that anyone can follow. Decker rounds out the behavioral focus of the first edition to include his powerful tool to organize content. Now you can learn to create focused, listener-based messages in half the time. Spend a few evenings with this complete book of speaking, and you will discover how to win the emotional trust of others―the true basis of communicating in any situation.
You'll learn:
· How to conquer "stage fright"
· How to inject dynamic energy into your voice
· Why eye contact helps win trust
· When and how to use humor to make a point
· A proven technique to eliminate "Umm" and "Ahh" from your speech
· A process to quickly organize your thoughts into a focused message
· How to move your communications from information to influence
· How to make an impact and be yourself―to an audience of one or one hundred
· Eight steps to transforming your communications experience
- Sales Rank: #492404 in Books
- Published on: 2008-09-16
- Released on: 2008-09-16
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.66" h x 1.02" w x 6.38" l, 1.08 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
- 288 pages
Review
“The Decker program is a real winner. [Bert Decker has] developed a truly unique method for brainstorming and quickly ordering ideas. I find that I can put a series of thoughts together into a coherent whole--and then easily deliver them to any size audience. I only wish I had learned this system as a young person in school!” ―Charles Schwab, chairman of Charles Schwab & Co.
“Bert Decker's patience and professionalism enabled me to create a message that was from the heart with a confident vision of the journey for the organization. Because he helped me rid my mind of following the script and helped me speak my mind, I actually enjoyed giving the talk.” ―Phil Harriman, president of Million Dollar Round Table
“Any professional manager needs to communicate well. The principles and insights of Decker Communications are outstanding--I use them every day.” ―Bob Geren, field manager for the Oakland Athletics
“I think what the [process] did at Siemens was to help us quickly frame our thinking into listener-relevant messages. Now we have a consistent template for communicating that starts with a point of view, tells everyone what needs to be done, and gives them reason for doing it. As we have incorporated this incredible tool into our normal process for communicating any message, our people have reacted very positively. It answers the human questions: What? Why? What's in it for me?” ―Susan Schramm, Senior Vice President of Sales and Marketing at Siemens
“At a time when public figures can often be creations of their handlers, Bert Decker gives a refreshing view. You've Got to Be Believed to Be Heard demonstrates how you can be real and still succeed.” ―Nancy Pelosi, Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives
“At a time when American companies desperately need to communicate well and energize their people while producing leaders at all levels, Bert Decker provides an empowering guidebook for communicating well to succeed in business.…A perfect blend of wisdom and practical experience.” ―Charles Garfield, author of Peak Performers and Second to None
“Bert Decker is to communicating what Tom Peters is to management. Whether you're connecting with an audience of one or one of thousands, You've Got to Be Believed to Be Heard must be your partner. Bert's book is the definitive work on mastering communications. Buy it, own it, write in it…and don't loan it out!” ―Judith Briles, author of The Confidence Factor and Woman to Woman 2000
“Great book! Lots of practical, easy-to-use, and invaluable information--tips and techniques that will enable anyone to maximize their communication skills. Everyone should have a copy on their desk.” ―Robert J. Kriegel, author of If It Ain't Broke…Break It!
About the Author
Bert Decker is chairman and founder of Decker Communications, Inc. For more than a quarter of a century, he and his associates have trained and transformed hundreds of thousands of executives, managers, and salespeople, for corporate clients such as AT&T, Charles Schwab & Co., HP, Pfizer, State Farm Insurance, Wells Fargo, and many others. Currently Decker spends much of his time speaking to associations and corporations across the country. He graduated with a B.A. in psychology from Yale University, is a past director of the National Speakers Association, and is chairman of the San Francisco Advisory Board of the Salvation Army. He lives with his wife in San Francisco, California.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Introduction A Leader Put to the Test The events of September 11, 2001, could not have been worse. The terrorist attacks were seared in the hearts of Americans because we saw them happen in immediate color. But the aftermath of fear, terror, and suspicion could have been worse—much worse. And communication made the difference. It was eight months into the presidency of George W. Bush. Mr. Bush was known primarily as a master of mangled syntax who had eked out a win in the narrowest election in history. He ran neck and neck with opponent Al Gore, a notoriously dull, dry speech-maker. As communicators, Gore was no Bill Clinton and Bush was no Ronald Reagan. On the evening of the attacks, President Bush spoke to the American people from the White House. "These acts of mass murder," he said, "were intended to frighten our nation into chaos and retreat. But they have failed. Our country is strong. A great people has been moved to defend a great nation.... None of us will ever forget this day, yet we go forward to defend freedom and all that is good and just in our world." As important as the words he spoke was his behavior—eyes steady, jaw resolute, shoulders firm. This was not the campaigner we had seen months before. This was a leader who was authentic. The speeches President Bush delivered that day gave the American people the sense that this man was ready to lead. Three days later, Friday, September 14, 2001, President Bush went to Washington Cathedral and gave what many consider the most eloquent speech of his presidency. He began in Lincolnesque form with words worthy of the Gettysburg Address. "We are here in the middle hour of our grief," he said. "So many have suffered so great a loss, and today we express our nation’s sorrow. We come before God to pray for the missing and the dead, and for those who loved them." He spoke as the commander in chief, appealing to our resolute strength and unity as Americans. He became America’s chaplain, saying, "Grief and tragedy and hatred are only for a time. Goodness, remembrance and love have no end, and the Lord of Life holds all who die and all who mourn." He inspired us with stories, briefly told, to remind us of the heroes of that day: "Inside the World Trade Center, one man who could have saved himself stayed until the end at the side of his quadriplegic friend. A beloved priest died giving the last rites to a firefighter. Two office workers, finding a disabled stranger, carried her down sixty-eight floors to safety. A group of men drove through the night from Dallas to Washington to bring skin grafts for burned victims." It was a memorable speech—but even more memorable was the speech he gave just a few hours later. He flew to New York and arrived at the sacred ground where the towers had stood. Now dressed in blue jeans and a brown jacket with an open collar, he was greeted by iron-workers and firemen shouting, "U-S-A! U-S-A!" The president walked and shook hands and shouted encouragement. Then he jumped up onto a fire truck with the help of retired fireman Bob Beckwith, who was working at ground zero as an unpaid volunteer. Beckwith was about to climb down, but the president said, "Stay right here," and put his arm around the man. As the chants of "U-S-A!" died down, someone handed a bullhorn to the president. "I want you all to know," Mr. Bush said, "that America today is on bended knee in prayer for the people whose lives were lost here, for the workers who work here, for the families who mourn." "I can’t hear you!" someone in the crowd shouted. "I can hear you!" the president shouted back through the bullhorn amid applause and cheers. "The rest of the world hears you! And the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon!" The applause and shouts of "U-S-A! U-S-A!" grew louder, and the president paused until the chanting subsided. "The nation sends its love and compassion to everybody who is here," he concluded. "Thank you for your hard work. Thank you for making the nation proud. And may God bless America." Becoming a President for All What happened? Did the inept communicator get coaching? Did Bush decide to communicate like Clinton? What was the transformation? President George W. Bush became authentic. He was not trying to play the role of president, as he had appeared to before. He was the president. He deeply felt this event and thus he felt his words, and he communicated that feeling. He was real, and authentic, and he had finally reached the First Brain of the American People. In June 2003, Pulitzer prize–winning journalist Carl Cannon of the nonpartisan weekly National Journal reflected on what has come to be known as the "Bullhorn Speech." He said, "If we didn’t have confidence in him as a communicator, we didn’t have confidence in him to do anything. So when Bush does that [the Bullhorn Speech], he really in that moment becomes a President for all the people, and a person that even people who didn’t vote for him...can look to as their Commander-in-Chief."1 This is a profound insight: When people have confidence in someone as a communicator, they have confidence in that person, period. The ability to communicate is essential to leadership. It’s indispensable to persuasion. It’s crucial to the ability to motivate, inspire, energize, galvanize, and mobilize an individual or a nation. The ability to communicate is the key to selling, whether you are selling a product, an idea, a political agenda, or a vision for the future. A Duty to Communicate Regardless of our political views, we can all relate to Mr. Bush in this sense. Few of us are naturally effective at communicating—and fewer still enjoy speaking before audiences. But when our circumstances demand greatness, we can rise to the challenge. We can all learn to be more effective communicators. Mr. Bush’s approval ratings peaked at 90 percent soon after 9/11, and then began a downward spiral. What accounted for this disastrous slide? For one thing, the war in Iraq was itself under continuous attack, being described in the media as a disaster—and Mr. Bush was saying little to counter that portrayal. Then came Hurricane Katrina. Once more the American people had horrors seared into their hearts as they could see the tragedy unfold on live television—this time a disaster wreaked by nature instead of man. And this time, where was the leadership? After four days, Mr. Bush strode into an aircraft hangar in Mobile, Alabama, to be briefed on the Katrina response. Greeting FEMA director Michael Brown, he said, "Brownie, you’re doing a heck of a job!" To millions of viewers, Mr. Bush seemed shockingly out of touch with reality. The situation cried out for another Bullhorn Speech. The president’s response seemed more bull than bullhorn. By April 2006, Mr. Bush’s approval ratings hit rock bottom. His presidency appeared to be on life support. Ironically, while his rankings were at an all-time low, the economy was astonishingly strong. The Dow Jones Industrial Average was approaching an all-time high. The nation was ringing up record retail sales. Unemployment was below 5 percent. The gross domestic product had grown 4.8 percent in the previous quarter. Minority-owned businesses were experiencing a dramatic upswing. And yet— The Simple Secret of Effective Communicating The message for all of us is clear: Whatever our life goals, our career goals, or our dreams of a better world, the key to success lies in our ability to communicate. No matter how uncomfortable or ill-equipped we feel as communicators, we dare not back away from the challenge of becoming effective speakers. Short on skills? We can learn th
Most helpful customer reviews
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Great advice that can improve your public speaking and communications ...
By Robert Kirk
Great advice that can improve your public speaking and communications skills instantly. I really enjoyed this book an the framework that the author presents at the end of the book is just wonderful. Books like this, where you can instantly apply what you learn, are rare and I think this is a book that I will be revisiting many more times in the future. I don't know how you couldn't drastically improve your speaking skills with this book and I highly recommend it.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Repetitious
By sexy dancer
The essence of the whole book is you have to be likeable and credible and it gets to be repetitious from chapter to chapter.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
Bubblegum & Trust
By John W. Pearson
"Communicating is a contact sport," says Bert Decker. "Your ability to communicate is the single most important skill determining your success in every aspect of your life. You dare not make the mistake of thinking that communication is nothing but dumping information on another person."
So what is communication? It's selling. "People buy on emotion and justify with facts," says Bert Decker. If he's right--you may need to tune-up your public communication style and skills. An emotional decision isn't necessarily the wrong decision, says the author, and then he reminds us what counts in public speaking: the 3 V's. Verbal is seven percent, vocal is 38 percent and visual (what the listener sees) is a whopping 55 percent. Yikes--the sub-conscious impression wins every time. So does likeability.
Decker trains politicians, Fortune 500 company CEOs and thousands of other people in effective public speaking. I dog-eared the pages in his book at least 30 times. Truth Number 1: "The spoken word is almost the polar opposite of the written word." He's right. "If you want the boss to give you a raise, don't send him a memo. Go to his office, look him in the eye, and persuade him that you're worth it."
The subtitle reads "The Complete Book of Speaking...in Business and in Life" and it is an amazingly complete book. Not only will you devour the take-`em-to-the-bank principles and ideas, you'll improve your own speaking ability immediately. Example: place paper faces on chairs in an empty room--and practice your talk.
"Old Communicators" get bogged down with too many boring facts. Apple's Steve Jobs (a "New Communicator") is "effective as a speaker because he's focused on the audience experience, not on dispensing data." He adds, "Use the action channel, not the information channel." (Last week, I listened to six speakers at a one-day conference. Five of them MUST read this book ASAP!)
The book is a page-turning joy to read--it grabbed my emotions and my brain. You'll appreciate Decker's insights on what makes a politician an effective communicator (Bush at Ground Zero versus Bush today). You'll never listen to your pastor or public speakers the same way again and you'll recognize bad habits instantly like the fig leaf flasher, the finger-pointer, and the sin of hiding behind lecterns (and pulpits). Another no-no: reading your speech. You'll also understand why communicators must first build trust--and why university students encountered a bubble gum machine outside their president's "open door policy" office.
Decker nails it: "The most important dimension of communication takes place not at the conscious level, but the unconscious level. We're talking about trust, believability and likeability--the emotional connection."
How important is this book? Earlier this year, I wrote Mastering the Management Buckets: 20 Critical Competencies for Leading Your Business or Nonprofit. Had I read Decker's book before I wrote mine, I would have added Bucket #21: The Public Speaker Bucket.
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