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Hump: True Tales of Sex After Kids, by Kimberly Ford
Download PDF Hump: True Tales of Sex After Kids, by Kimberly Ford
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"Kimberly Ford is a gift to every woman who accidentally left her sex life in the maternity ward. Hump is brainy and earthy and downright inspiring."―Kelly Corrigan, author of The Middle Place
Cheerfully honest, sometimes startling―and just a bit dirty―HUMP is a smart, subversive look behind real-life parental bedroom doors
Hump puts the lie to the conventional wisdom that once your children are born, your sex life dies. Hump is the chronicle of how a wide variety of couples have reclaimed their former, more sexy selves even amid the chaos of households teeming with young children. Hump is organized into thought-providing sections, including chapters such as:
--"Back in the Saddle" (first-time-after-childbirth sex)
--"I touch myself" (self―ahem―explanatory)
--"Snip!" (vasectomies)
--"Snap!" (what happens when the condom breaks)
By turns poetic and informative, Hump will inspire women to reclaim their bodies for themselves and their husbands, and to make sex a priority in their own lives no matter how many scuffed sneakers they have to kick out of the way to make it to bed.
- Sales Rank: #1569915 in Books
- Published on: 2008-07-08
- Released on: 2008-07-08
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .65" w x 5.50" l, .61 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 288 pages
- ISBN13: 9780312376826
- Condition: New
- Notes: BRAND NEW FROM PUBLISHER! 100% Satisfaction Guarantee. Tracking provided on most orders. Buy with Confidence! Millions of books sold!
From Publishers Weekly
Journalist Ford's debut, a collection of essays about how sexuality changes after children are added to the marital equation, is a flaccid affair. Despite the abundance of steamy vernacular, the author's tepid and detached delivery—and fondness for third-party reportage—make her come across as removed and impassive. Ford is a clunky stylist; her choice to refer to couples in her bawdy anecdotes as baby Nate's mom and Lucas' young dad stunt much of the book's comedic—and carnal—potential. Moments that should have left readers hooting and blushing—such as an explosively flatulent infant in bed with a couple engaged in vigorous lovemaking—fail to deliver. The chapters Pleasure Party and Kinderotics do entertain in their descriptions of women-only crowds attempting to reclaim or augment their sexual prowess through erotic dancing and myriad sex toys. Ford is capable of movingly depicting the pure doggedness of lust after childbirth and child-rearing and inspires with stories of rekindled passion; when she goes for laughs, however, her book falls flat. (July)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Review
“A thoughtful and engaging dive into the post-partum bedroom. I found myself surprisingly inspired and heartily concurring with the passionate Ms. Ford!” ―Christie Mellor, author of The Three-Martini Playdate and Were You Raised by Wolves?
“Hot and hopeful, Hump shows us that post-partum sex is not only possible, but a beautiful thing to be desired in itself. This book should be on every tired mommy's night stand, next to her vibrator.” ―Erika Schickel, author of You're Not the Boss of Me
“Hide it where the kids won't find it! This bawdy memoir, written by a self-described ‘pro-sex' mom, is what every parent needs to spice up the daily dose of diaper changing and drool. A celebration of sex in the context of marriage, Ford's Hump will inspire more adult playtime and greater intimacy with your spouse.” ―Jennifer Margulis, author of Why Babies Do That
“Racy, fun and intelligent, this book should be required reading for new parents. It's a sure-cure for even the worst case of wilted libido.” ―Cindy La Ferle, award-winning journalist and author of Writing Home
“Hump is like an invitation to the circle of friends every mother needs…the women who make her feel safe, challenged, respected, and most of all, entertained.” ―Martha Brockenbrough, author of It Could Happen to You: Diary of a Pregnancy and Beyond
“Written with honesty, style and wit--Ford's stories assure us that a lifetime of passionate humping can be ours!” ―Brett Paesel, author of Mommies Who Drink: Sex, Drugs and Other Distant Memories of an Ordinary Mom
“Finally a book about sex after children that isn't a saccharine, maudlin, mess.” ―Pepper Schwartz, author of Prime: Adventures and Advice on Sex, Love and the Sensual Years
“Blunt and funny, Hump is California-Kim's definitive antidote to post-partum depression, detailing the frankly explicit solo and partnered thrills of sex. She invites us to appreciate her evidence: our reproductive imperative enhances rather than impedes healthy genital friction.” ―Lynn Margulis, Distinguished University professor, University of Massachusetts-Amherst, Department of Geosciences, co-author with Dorion Sagan of Mystery Dance: On the Evolution of Human Sexuality
About the Author
KIMBERLY FORD, as Kimberly Chisholm, has written for The Threepenny Review and Literary Mama, among other publications. She has a Ph.D. from the University of California, Berkeley in Spanish and French Literature. She and her husband, along with their young three children, live near San Francisco.
Most helpful customer reviews
23 of 27 people found the following review helpful.
Somewhat disappointed
By Half Dome climbers
I chose this book due to a rave review in a mommy blog I read and the five star reviews here on Amazon, and had high hopes for some "creative" ways to improve our monogamous, post-baby sex life. I am, apparently, the only disappointed reader so far.
In the introduction, Kimberly (I can't seem to call her Mrs. Ford after having read so much about her personal life) uses the word F**K more times than I have seen in print, ever. There is a chapter on vibrators, and the clear opinion that EVERYONE needs one, or rather MANY, on hand for all intimate moments. Having used one, I can say with experience, "Yes, they have a place." But so does a husband who takes the time to learn just what to do, and does it.
Another chapter discusses pornography as a way of spicing up your marriage. I am sad to say I know more than a few wives whose husbands are addicted to pornography and it has damaged their marriage, and their intimacy, irreparably. Kimberly is not advocating pornography as an addiction, but I doubt these men intended it that way at the beginning. I think it would take a strong man to only view with his wife, and therein lies the problem.
A couple of useful chapters, if you know little about your own body, are the ones on "self exploration" and the one on masturbation. The chapter on vasectomies (Snip) and abortion (Snap) were mostly well done. But the chapters on bikini waxing as a way to "improve sensation" and the one on "pleasure parties" and her experience with a professional lap dancer were more than a little strange.
I appreciate her honesty, and her sense of humor. But, I guess I was looking for something different. I personally am not comfortable with using pornography (I have watched in the past, and it isn't my thing.) I have no desire to learn to lap or pole dance, and I don't have girl friends with whom I am comfortable practicing, and I don't find a drawer of various vibrators necessary, personally.
So, if you are looking for fun stories about married "mommy sex", this may be for you. If you are looking for practical advice on how to improve sex and intimacy with your husband, keep looking.
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Very funny for dads . . .
By RMJ
As evidenced by the first line of the book (not printable here?), this is a great book for husbands. It's not quite Dave Barry, but there are some definite "laughed so hard I couldn't speak" moments here. Whether it was the experiences with Zing Cream, the chapter about not getting "snipped", couples are creating "private time", or one couple's "top 10 reasons to have sex", I found myself laughing out loud over and over and over again.
Everyone knows that a healthy sex life makes for a better marriage and happier partners, but most of the time the only advice we get is "you gotta schedule it". I found HUMP to be about all the interesting, creative, and very very funny ways that a group of real people bring sexuality into the daily (and nightly) craziness of parenthood.
About 10 years ago, Paul Reiser (remember the TV show Mad About You w/ Helen Hunt?) wrote a hilarious but G-rated book called "Parenthood". This is the R-rated version . . . and it's probably funnier and more meaningful at the same time.
The only thing that's missing from this book? We need an Afterword to explain how that one guy can tell when his wife is ovulating. That's a talent we all need!
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
A Guy's Perspective
By ft
There is a lot more to this book than meets the eye, and that is why I enjoyed it. Yes, sex is the unifying theme, which is certainly a great hook, but it's really just one element and if you are looking for a simple manual then a) God help you and b) there are probably better choices. To me, this book was like a fascinating anthropological study of cultures I am not completely familiar with including people with Ivy League educations, who go to church, have wildly successful careers, and possess the ability to communicate openly about their sexuality not only with their spouses, but also broadly with their friends. The people in this book are who the good, smart kids grew up to be- and you have to remember that not so long ago "good" kids didn't publicly proclaim their love of sex- especially women. I don't relate to many of the life experiences written here, but I love reading about them, and I do relate to the shared reverence for sex. I think it may be a little intimidating for some though. Indeed, the author possesses a libido which may intimidate some female readers, while male readers may find themselves saying "THAT'S what I'm talking about". But at some point you realize what makes Kim Ford truly a freak is her ability to regularly start her day at 4AM so she can claim some "me-time" in more ways than one. We all want to- but she DOES it- and this too is thematic. So as a vehicle for advancing dialogue about sex in the wake of a newborn, it didn't work. However, as a source of inspiring ideas, it was well worth it. Specifically: buy a vibrator. A good one. Immediately. The book also helped me realize the role sex plays as a way of connecting with your spouse on very adult terms. If the bulk of your relationship with each other is based on reviewing the latest developments of your children, then you may be missing out on the bonding that takes place when you relate to each other like only adults can, and I think that may be the bigger message of the book. The book will encourage you to go to the edge of your taboos and step over the line, but only touches on the very common experience of getting smashed together as foreplay, not to mention a complete lack of reference to the intense bonding and mind-blowing sex that can come with common, but illegal, substances- too taboo I suppose. If you are the kind of voyeuristic guy that likes to sneak a look at Cosmo to find out what exactly is included in the "172 New Sex Moves that will have him scraping his brains off the ceiling" article, but wish the article was actually interesting and more intelligent, then you'll like this book.
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